Ask two or three people who have seen you with children and are not relatives. Ask each one separately, and get two separate yeses: one to give their phone number or email to new families, and one to put their words on your website. Keep a note of who said what, follow up once if they have not answered in about five days, and thank them after a family calls.
Relatives are the reference parents trust least. If you are just starting, a youth leader who has watched you with a room of toddlers is worth more than a family friend who has known you for years.
Ask by message so they can answer when it suits them, keep it short, and make it easy to say no. These are the drafts the app writes (the name is invented):
Hi Dana! It's [your name]. A new family I may be sitting for asked for a reference. Would it be okay if I gave them your phone number so they can ask you a few questions about my babysitting? If you'd rather not, no problem at all. Thank you!
Hi Dana! It's [your name]. I've loved watching your kids, and I'm putting together a simple website for my babysitting. Would you be willing to write two or three sentences about what it's been like having me sit? Anything honest is welcome. I'll only put your first name and last initial on the site, and only if you say yes. Thank you so much!
"Can I give your number to families?" and "Can I quote you on my website?" are different requests. Someone happy to take one phone call may not want their words public, and the reverse. Record each answer as yes, no or not asked yet, and only act on a yes. On a website, show the quote in their own words, with a first name and last initial, and leave out children's names and photos unless the parents agree to that too. If someone changes their mind, take the quote down.
Tell your references which family may call and roughly when, so the call is not a surprise.
Many parents also ask to see your CPR and First Aid certificate, want a short meet-and-greet before the first sit, and look you up online. Some ask for a background check: a reputable screening service asks for your written permission before it runs one, so read what you are agreeing to and ask who will see the result. Have your certificate dates, your rate card and your policies ready to send.
Keep track in the app. The References tab in the Babysitting Business Kit drafts these requests, reminds you to follow up after five days, keeps the two consent answers separately, and only puts quotes marked "yes, publish" on the website it builds for you, with first name and last initial. Free, in your browser, no account.
Someone who has watched you with children and is not a relative: a family you have sat for, a church nursery or Sunday school leader, a teacher or coach you helped, a camp director, or a parent whose children you have looked after informally. Two or three good ones are enough.
Yes, ask first, every time you start using them as a reference. Ask two separate questions: may you give their phone number or email to new families, and may their words appear on your website. A yes to one is not a yes to the other, so record both answers.
Usually how they know you and for how long, how the children responded to you, whether you were on time and did what was agreed, how you handled a problem such as a fall, a fever or a meltdown, whether they would book you again, and anything they would want a new family to know.
Only with their clear yes, in their own words, and never edited to say more than they said. Show a first name and last initial rather than a full name, and leave children's names and photos out unless the parents agree to that too.